Thursday, December 15, 2011

6 weeks

This post is all about me. I mean that in an obnoxious self-pitying transparent way. The 6 weeks since we have met our little man have been an amusement ride of emotion.  The disappointment of not passing on the day of our court date gave way to the elation of passing two weeks later.  Then we moved to dreaming about when we would be bringing him home.  Braided in is the sadness that Efa would be leaving the only home he has known, the only woman he has known as "mom", and the "family" he has loved and been loved by.  We have our birth certificate and our passport.

The ride has just gotten terrifying.  Watching a friend with a different agency who traveled with us, pass court, be submitted, clear, and leave to bring home... So excited to welcome home E.  (Did I mention she is the same age as Bella and I love her mom?)  Watching my sweet friend Emily, pass court, be submitted, and clear (thank you Lord).  We have not been submitted to embassy.  I trust that our agency is doing everything they can to be submitted and successful at the embassy level.

But this brings me to my pets.  We have two new pets-Discouragement and Impatience.  Actually, I am not sure how new they are.  They are normally caged, but they are sneaky, and often escape and run rampant in the house.  They are quite destructive.  The craziest things can release them.  They feed on the most unexpected things...expectations are like a Red Bull to them.  They go crazy!  I hate admitting it.  But I am truly hoping to vanquish them from the house.  As I am becoming more aware of them and their triggers...I have come to realize that they did not move in just recently.  They think that they have lived here forever.

So, I wait.  I wait to be submitted in this beautiful season where we await the Greatest Gift.  The parallel is not lost on us.  In fact it becomes even more clear why I need Him.  I am so flawed.   My heart aches to bring this little boy home.   I pray for his case to be submitted.  I pray that the USE sees the evidence and allows Efa to come home.  I pray for patience.  I pray for a stronger faith.  I pray for encouragement.  I pray not to feel forgotten.



May the God of hope fill (me) with all joy and peace as (I) trust in Him, so that (I) may overflow with hope by the power of the Holy Spirit.  Romans 15:13

9 comments:

Jennifer said...

I am praying that your sweet boy can come home soon. The wait between court and embassy is so hard. Praying that God will fill you with the joy and peace that only He can give!

Jenn said...

This is so good. And ick, those pets... I need to get rid of them too.

Love you!!

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I'm praying that he could be come home soon..
God Bless!

scooping it up said...

Praying for you guys. Sending love. We love you Efa!

Bonnie Nieuwstraten said...

Praying for you tonight. I know this is hard. I just had a local friend who passed court in July and just traveled for Embassy last week. Agonizing to wait, but God IS faithful. Enjoy your Christmas with your sweet family!

PS: Took my blog private while you were gone. If you'd like to keep in touch with the life of Grace, feel free to email me. dbn@sterling.net

coffeemom said...

He's coming home. Soon soon. And just kick those mangy dogs when they start to bark.....praying him home and for your tender hearts this season..love you! M

emily said...

Really good friend. Love the honesty. You know I will LOVE that sweet boy for you......he will come home soon! Rest in His goodness. Love you.

Deena said...

I'll be praying that you receive a beautiful Christmas blessing...an embassy appointment! Thanks for sharing your heart while you wait...oh the joy that will come when your sweet little one comes home- 2012 will be an amazing year for you!

Rebecca said...

Just stopped to say a prayer for you. Hoping your submitted soon and that you can bring your sweet Efa home!