Saturday, October 10, 2009

Three weeks

Home for 3 weeks.

Can't believe she has not been with our family forever. She is unbelievable. She is so funny and fun. She is actually small for her age, although very healthy. She is right on target for her age developmentally. She did have some catching up to do with some of the things US kids are expected to do...stairs...but 2 weeks in she had them down.

Sleeping is okay. She is in a crib but I don't let her cry. She is held or rocked until she is sleepy and then she holds my hand until she is asleep. We have not mastered the sleep thing, but we are making progress.

Eating. She does not eat veggies or any fruit but bananas and applesauce. She loves bagels, meat, coffee, tea, orange juice, spaghetti sauce on spaghetti. She is not a great eater. She has actually lost several pounds from the last update we got before we got her. I have Ethiopian food for her, too.

Safety. Cars. She has no fear of moving cars and had no concept of sidewalk v. street. I have nightmares about this one.

Bonding. This child (as all deserve to be) is wired to be cherished. This is just one way she shows it....she had a scratch on her nose. Like I do or did with my older kids...I went to put neosporin on it and you would think that she had been handed a wrapped gift. She hugged and kissed me so tightly that you could forget that she is a two year old. She then proceeded to show me her other little marks/scars so I could put some on them. It is now part of our bed time routine. Bonding is a process, but we are so much further than I expected. She is on my hip but venturing out. For those of you reading books....she is social referencing. She is absolutely snugly and loves being rocked and held and cooed too.

Siblings. She loves her siblings. She runs to them when they walk in the door. She loves to do anything to get them to laugh. See video below.

Daddy. the first week she had very little to do with Jason. I think it hurt his feelings because truly he is the FUN parent. He has a great way with little ones. He coaches and is very involved. She still needs me to be around but she is sooo excited when she hears his car pull in.






Toddler adoption. Do it. Is it work? Yes. Is it worth it? So.

This is a hard thing for me to write about because sometimes it is really hard...the adjustment and the bonding. I mean really hard. I lived it. My sister was adopted as a toddler (even younger toddler than Bella) 35 years ago. Before the books. Before the therapists. Before the studies. She had/has severe bonding issues. There in lies the need to tell you that not all toddler adoption is hard. Physically...it is hard. Going from 0-2 overnight. Hard. Lifting the 30lbs. Hard. Sleep deprivation. Hard. Going back to diapers. Yucky. Occasional tantrums. Inconvenient. Loving this child. Not hard.

15 comments:

Christy. said...

Oh this post made me cry!! Your honesty is so sweet and I can tell that you love your daughter so deeply!


And the dancing, oh the dancing!! She's got some cool groove... :0)

Christy. said...

We started the process in December of 08 and were told that once we got on the wait list (May 09) it would go fast. Then they said the estimate of wait time would be 5-7 months and now they are saying 8-10 months. Ahhh, the joys of international adoption...

We are requesting a boy, 12-30 months, so we have always envisioned that we will be bringing home a 2 year old little boy!

So, we are almost 5 months on the wait list and praying for peace in the wait! It could be Monday or it could be 5 more months... :0)

Yes, follow along on our journey. I am sure there will come a time when I would love to pick your brain about attachment/bonding with a toddler.

Have a great weekend!!

emily said...

So precious! I love it.

We can't wait to have our own little booty shaker here with us. Bellas partner in crime. :)

Rahel said...

Awesome booty shaking! She is beautiful!

Farmboy and Buttercup said...

Great post! Keep them up. Hopefully I will have time occasionally to peek in!

Tonya said...

Hi Jennifer,

I haven't been able to reach you via email but I wanted to say hi. I'm glad things are going well with Bela. My Senait is doing well. It is like she has always been here. Tell Jason and Eliza we said hello. Take care, Tonya

Tonya said...

Hi Jennifer,

I haven't been able to reach you via email but I wanted to say hi. I'm glad things are going well with Bela. My Senait is doing well. It is like she has always been here. Take care,TOnya

LoveNotes4CocoPrincess said...

Love the video, especially at 00.23 -00.25 because it looks like she is saying, "Whew.enough.it's.a.wrap!"

Tara said...

hi, just had to reply, we are having similar experiances with our daughter who is 4, so happy for you!!!!

coffeemom said...

Well, I love every bit of this. YOu know it. And LOVE the video because she's a happy kid...and we knew it all along!

J, A and T said...

Oh my gosh....love the video....Yesi even got a giggle!!!!

The Mathews Family said...

Thank you for this post! So encouraging!!! AND what a beautiful little girl you have! PRECIOUS!

We just hit wait list today. (we are requesting a girl 1-3 years old)

Blessings!

The Mathews Family

Justine said...

So well said. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE this age. It is hard but so beautiful watching them become these funny, lovely independent people.

Bella has some moves too!

Sparkz said...

Well said!

Pineapple Princess said...

I want God to bless you, bless you!
Beautiful post!! :)

Merry Christmas!