Monday, March 22, 2010

Six months/3y old

Bella woke up to her room filled with balloons on her birthday. She loved the princess balloon the most. The following pics were from a picnic dinner at the harbor. She loved throwing rocks in the water and playing soccer and lacrosse with the older kids.

I can't believe it has been 6m. Bella turned 3 about a week ago, too. Truly, it is as if she has been with us forever...mostly (I'll get to that in a moment.) We had our 6m post placement visit, too. Our SW is shocked and amazed at how well she is language, in development, in attachment, and in confidence. All good news. A Bella story: When asked what time she goes to bed...Bella answered before I could. "After, American Idol." Oh well, I asked the SW can you lie and say 8? :)

Now keeping it real...there are small reminders that if fact she did not come to us without some wounds. When I leave her with Jason or the kids...she still asks me..."but you are my mommy, right?" It is as if she is making sure we aren't going to have a shift change. Then last night, I left her with Jason. they were having a ball running errands and just hanging around. Out of the blue, (so out of the blue that Jason thought she was kidding at first) she gets up in her chair at the table and puts her head down and starts to wail for me. Tears running down her face asking Jason get me. She has never done this before. Did she think I wasn't coming home? I don't know but she is def processing something. While she has been sleeping the whole night in her bed...the past several nights she has been coming in with us. It serves as a good reminder to me that while she is doing so well...there is an unknown. There is a hurt that will need to heal. She will come to trust that we are going nowhere. That in fact we are her mommy and daddy. How will we know that she knows. I don't know. Maybe she will stop asking before one of us is leaving her. Maybe we will just know. Or maybe not. i do know that when I start to get impatient with her because she is taking so long to get in her car seat, or my back is killing me because 30lbs is alot to carry...I think back to a year ago when we knew her but had never held her. What I would have given to have an aching back, then! What I would have given to be waiting for her to climb in her seat instead of on a court date! So, I am enjoying the waiting and the aching, now. I trust she won't want me to carry her when she is 100lbs:)

Six months home. She is doing much better than I imagined. She is doing better than the SW could have imagined. I have to give credit where it is due. I truly believe that she is doing as well as she is for a few reasons. 1. pure blessing 2. who she is 3. what she experienced at Gladney (there almost exactly one year) and 4. what she experienced with her ET family.


Deena said...

Happy Birthday Bella! She is so darn cute! I can't believe how long her hair is getting. Thanks so much for the honest post. I appreciate all of your insight and I just can't wait to experience it myself with our new addition! :)

coffeemom said...

Beautiful Bella!!! And beautiful mama and familia! You have the perfect heart for this sweet girl, the one she needs to understand those hidden thorns that can prick and make her cry...unexpected but no less needing your heart and arms to comfort...and your back! Good job Mom! Happy Bday Sweet dear Bella!

Laura said...

I have enjoyed reading about your journey, what a blessing little Bella is doing so well!. We adopted our son and daughter 2 1/2 years ago from Guatemala. Our son was 2 1/2 when he came home and really adjusted so well. But I agree it continues to take time. I forget that they are adopted most of the time but then they surprise me, my son just this week said mom you are going to be my mom forever and ever right? Even in heaven? So I know he still thinks about it. Thank you for sharing your journey I will continue to check in!