Friday, September 25, 2009

The Day we Met




Travis delivered Bella to us. You could hear her crying two blocks away. (Not exaggerating). When he came to the gate she had stopped only to start up again when she saw us. She cried for a good 20 minutes with me holding her and just saying..."it's okay, ishy, ishy, ishy." she calmed a little bit and we pulled out silly string. I pointed and shot and it unintentionally went all over Jason's face. We all were surprised....shock value...she stopped crying. After that we just played quietly along side each other with some Polly Pockets that I picked up on sale. I have no idea how long we played, but it was for a long time. She slowly relaxed. We ate a snack and took a short nap. When she got up, I expected more of the same...but she was fine. She has been my "cling-on" since. While in country we made the decision that we would not use a care giver. We would only leave her with Jason, me, or Eliza. We felt it was too confusing for her. Other families used them with no long term problem. We just thought at her age it was too much. Are we done with the bonding process...no way. She needs to learn to trust that I will come back if I go, she needs to learn that I love her no matter what - she was told "no" sternly after biting me and she simply crumbled, that hurt my heart more than the bite...she is still processing so much and will probably process forever but we are doing well. Better than I expected. There are moments that I just hurt for all that she has lost-things that she is completely unaware of at the moment, some she is not unaware of. she went around the house calling for a friend still in care. I pulled out the pictures to show her. She used her special care giver's name...and again I pulled out the pictures.

I will post later on adopting an "older" child. Funny that she is considered by some to be older. She is a baby. Everything is so new. But I will leave you with just a thought...if you are torn, or thinking about increasing your age...we were and did. We are also so very happy we did increase the age. Had we not listened to our hearts and gotten a little nudge from this mom....we would not have our sweet baby.

More later.... Bella is restless :)

12 comments:

Sam said...

I may have a video of your little one. I am going to try to email it to you

emily said...

Love the pictures!! Keep these coming. :)

Just so beautiful, to think of all those hours we lamented on the phone and you are HOME!!!!

Christy. said...

Thanks so much for this post and the others that you will post about adopting an "older" child. We have been on the wait list with CHI for just over 4 months now and we are requesting a boy, 12-29 months old. I have some anxious feelings about adopting a two year old but I know that God is in control. Any helpful tips and advice would be great!
She is darling!!

Melodie Monberg said...

We were at the US Embassy consulate in Addis when you came with your little girl. I think I was so jetlag and had a pretty sick girl that I didn't but two and two together until I saw your blog post on the Alexanders. We were there Tuesday afternoon. Anyway, just wanted to say congratulations! I remember your sweet little girl and her cute backpack.

Melodie
www.themonbergs.com

coffeemom said...

BEAUTIFUL!!! Love the pics!!! These are, of course, simply priceless. You are both so beautiful and you KNOW how happy we are for you all!!!

more more more! Love m

Stacey said...

Thank you so much for delivering our care package to Nardos and Nahom and especially for the photos. They were a huge blessing to us! Bella is so beautiful. I can't wait to meet our beauties in person!

Lori said...

xoxoxoxoxo

Rahel said...

love me some bella! she is a doll!

Farmboy and Buttercup said...

LOVE the update. Thanks for sharing the details. I kind of envision our first moments, days with our little one will go the same way. Polly Pockets -- I NEED to get some of those!

So glad to see your little girl finally in your arms.

Katy said...

The picture of you and her on the bed is so beautiful. I feel so lucky to have met her and seen you, Bella, and Eliza in action. It's really a wonderful thing. I can't wait to see what happens next.

Sparkz said...

Talk about goosebumps. What a beautiful post. It's so good to see Bela in your arms loved and safe. We have been considering an older child and I loved hearing about how things went. Thank you! PS: How is her hearing?

Justine said...

Getting chills reading your post. It is so very powerful, isn't it? Bella is just gorgeous. I too can't advocate enough for toddler adoption. Would do it again in a heartbeat! Wait, did I just write that?!