So we have finished week 9. We found out yesterday that we will have to do an addendum to our home study and then file that addendum with CIS. We will also have o get Gladney approval, again. My impression is that it should not be long processes. The Gladney approval should not be a big deal, either. I was so discouraged when I received the news. I was hoping that it would be simple. It seemed overwhelming. I must have been tired of the prospect of more paperwork. Thankfully, I am married to a wonderful man that must have picked up on my exhaustion... because he volunteered to pick up the baton in the paper chase relay.
*Note to self (and anyone else who cares) when you do the home study have your "preference" be as broad as it can be. You will get the opportunity to be more specific, later. I wish that I had known this at an earlier date.
**So I wrote that a day after getting the email spelling out what we will need to do. Today, I feel even less overwhelmed. It is doable. No the idea of having to get anything from CIS is still daunting (the timing is scarey-will it take two weeks or two months?).
A little realness. When I was pregnant with Eliza, I remember wondering how would I love any child as much as Andrew. As a child my parents explained that love was similar to the light of a candle. You don't have a limited quantity to give, it is infinite. You can light an infinite number of candles from one flame. It does not diminish the light given off by that one candle, it grows the light around you. They had five children and I was trying to figure out who they loved most, sure that it was me:) Skip forward to now. As we get closer to getting Little M's referral, I have that same nudging feeling (not overwhelming, but on the periphery)... What if I feel nothing when I see Little M? I mentioned it to Jason. I did not think that I could love that man more, but I do after his response. "But it will be our Little M." I remember how we thought our children were the most perfect babies. Every time we went to pick up one of the foster babies, we thought they were just as perfect, just as beautiful, just as much of a gift. How little faith I have sometimes! While I may not respond to a photo immediately, Little M has already become part of my dreams. If you want something great to read about Love... coffeemom said it so beautifully, go read.