Found

After three weeks in the black hole, our originals documents showed up at USCIS.  Now, we wait for the i171h.  When I think about the "lost time,"  I get so frustrated.  I have to think that the wait is productive in some fashion.  Is it to prepare our hearts?  Is the wait to give a mother some time with the child who will become ours? 

 

Happy Birthday Zach!

Zach turns 10 today.  The many faces of Zach.  He loves soccer.  He loves babies.  He is quirky and affectionate.  He is also tough as nails.  Happy Birthday!

Beautiful New England Saturday

On this beautiful Saturday morning.  I find that I am in the house alone.  Eliza is off riding.  Zach and Jason are off at a soccer match about an hour away.  Andrew is at his team's soccer match, watching.  I have just completed my CBS lesson and have moved on to studying for my Anatomy and Physiology test.  Before that though, I have decided to sit and pray for a moment for:

Biopsy.  My father who is raising Chris (age 13) alone goes in for a biopsy next month.  My parents adopted Chris when he was a few years old.   My mother was killed five years ago (long story for another day).  For Chris's sake and the rest of us, we need everything to be okay.

Mild concussion.  Andrew got a mild concussion in the game on Wednesday.  He is out for today's game but hopefully will be back playing this next week, strong and healthy.

Lost paperwork. Still waiting for our i171. They needed to see some original documents, so we sent them those over a week ago.  Did I say that they are the originals that seem to be lost?  I keep thinking, "in God's time." They will find them. We will eventually get the i171.  It is an exercise in patience and peace.

Blog friends.  Needing a successful court date or for their baby to be revealed.

Samuel.  Most of you know who I mean.  He and his family have been at the top of my list.  

The list keeps getting longer and I have gotten less shy to ask for prayers.

Does patience = peace?

Small steps in the adoption front.  We had our conference call with Jessica at Gladney.  She seems lovely.  I am at peace with the wait (at the moment).  I came out of the talk though, thinking.  The closer we get the further it seems.  As we get closer the wait time seems so much longer and painful.  There is a Chinese proverb that says he who knows patience knows peace.  I am not sure if Rebecca, Lori S, and Chelsea would agree ( just to name a few.)  I am so praying for them.  They have been so patient.  Maybe when we surrender to God's time, we know the peace.  I don't know.  I do know that at some moments I am so at peace and others I am so crazy.  They seem so peaceful and are handling this wait so gracefully that when I get to where they are, I can only hope that I handle it as well.

Going to a talk tonight on Surviving the Teen Years While Keeping Your Sanity at BC High. I will have tons of food for thought. Most importantly, I think she is approaching the issues with a sense of humor. I absolutely subscribe to that. I am sure I will feel compelled to write on that.

So have I mentioned (this week) that I love CBS?  I do.  This week , a couple things hit me.  How do I decide what impact people have in my life?  How often do they tell me what they know I want to hear?  Do I/we listen or take advice from a talk show host, a radio commentator, friends , "experts"?  Not bad, just notice who influences us.  Why do I turn to God for the crisis or big decisions but ask for no guidance with the small ones?  hmmmm  This week I am going to write down all the small or big decisions (should we move to a bigger house? should we change our referral? what do I need to do about a friend who just does not "get" disrupting the balance and adopting? -to-  how should I decorate the sun room?  what should I make for dinner?-just to name a few)  Instead of going to the usual source of advice, I am going to prayerfully ask for answers.  ("You may be surprised at how faithfully He answers when you get into the habit of asking Him for advice."- from the Community Bible Study workbook)  I also realized how much I miss my mother who died a little over five years ago.  She was amazing at helping me to reflect without telling me what I wanted to hear or what she wanted me to do.  Oh well.  

Cooking and Community

We had our Ethiopian cooking class at my house yesterday.  I love the people that came.  Some have adopted.  Some are adopting.  Some are single, some married.  Some have/are adopting siblings, older boy, babies... Basically we are all coming from a different perspective to the same point.  We all have an invested interest in Ethiopia.  I truly enjoy these parents.  It was a a great community experience.

 

Elsa, previously a restauranteur in Addis, came a prepared several dishes for us.  We watch and tried to take in as much as we could.  Bottom line, it was so second nature to her, and so new to me, that it would be difficult for me to recreate.  I am learning.  Small steps.  If I can get recipes, I will post them.

Tagged

I was tagged by Emily.

1.  I grew up in a bio/trans-racial adoptive family.  My parents had 4 children, adopted a girl while we lived in India, and adopted again several years later.  The youngest is 13, now.

2.  One of my sisters was/is a "super-model" (has walked the cat walk, been on Vogue, ELLE, Glamour, Cosmopolitan, etc... been on Conan O'Brien) My brother played for the Blue Jays. Another sister worked for Reagan and Bush (senior).  Thus, I have always lead the most regular life in my family.  Some might say boring.  Boring can be beautiful - absent of drama and filled with love.

3.  I have to end every meal with "dessert" or something sweet.

4.  My family did not have a TV until I was a senior in high school, so I missed out on all those shows like The Brady Bunch.

5.  I love to read really well written children's books. I just finished the Miraculous Journey of Edward Tulane, and just started The Tale of Despereaux by the same author.  I am reading  it to myself and then will read it to Zach when we are finished with the one that we are reading together.

6.  I turn into "the wicked witch of the west" after 9.  No really!  I can be peaceful and patient until the clock says 9pm.  

7.  When my kids were little, after 4 they had to practice "peace-ability" - the ability to be peaceful.  I have a noise thing.  I can't always tolerate loud noises.

That was actually fun!  Off to a soccer game and then cooking class at my house.  I will post pictures and hopefully recipes, soon.  Here are some of my favorite blogs or people who have played a special role in our adoption process.

I tag, :

1.  Lori

2.  Lori S

3.  Katy

4.  Rebbecca

5.  Chelsea

6.  Buttercup (the first person who I spoke to about adoption-outside the family)

7.  Heidi (who is a reminder to me how small the world really is)

Have a wonderful weekend.  

Humanitarian Aid

A friend took this picture.  Since this is what we spend a bulk of our time doing, I thought that I should post it.  

We have been thinking a lot about the Humanitarian Aid that we want to do for the orphanages.  Just trying to think on it because Andrew is on this board of students that mobilize other student involvement in community service.  In CBS last week the following quote struck me:  "It is the work that God does through us that counts, not what we do for Him."   (Oswald Chambers, My Utmost for His Highest)  I think that we may have been going about it the wrong way.  I believe that we have to be patient and be open to anything. 

 There was another time in our lives that I was selfishly fearful and decided to remain open to the experience, to God's hand in our lives.  Four years ago, a friend mentioned to me that Catholic Charities needed help because a baby was due, the mom was making an adoption plan but was not finished, so they needed a place for him/her to go.  Would I consider doing it?  It would be two weeks, tops.  My thought was, "I can do anything for two weeks."  Then I talked to the SW and found out that the typical placement took 8 weeks.  Now that was scary.  I would have to give up my "life" for that long?!  I could not go to the gym.  What about my regular nights out with Jason?!  Instead of walking away, we decided to let God do his work.  It was an amazing experience.  No, I could not go to the gym.  No, we did not get much sleep.  No, we did not get out as much as we normally do.  The trade offs were huge.  Two of my friends signed up to do it, as well.  The people we met!  The children we loved!  The path it brought us down!  Wow!

So back to the Humanitarian Aid, any ideas?  

Gladney Approved

We are officially Gladney approved.  I know, I know you thought we were already.  Today it is official.  We are waiting for the 171, now.  After that.  We should be on the wait list.  Yeah!

We are doing an Ethiopian cooking class at my house next Saturday.  So excited to learn about making the food.

I ordered a book/cd set to learn some Amharic.  Some of the fun is in the preparation, but I can hardly wait to hold and snuggle our new little girl or guy.

Priorities?

One of the exercises in CBS (community bible study) was to identify your priorities by looking at your checkbook and your calendar.  This one, was eye opening.  We spend an inordinate amount of time at soccer, playing it or coaching it.  It is interesting to see where we give of most of our time and money.  Are these areas really our priority?

That being said, fall is underway.  Both boys play on two teams.  Andrew's high school team is doing well.  More importantly he has stayed healthy.  We are only half way through the season, so prayers would be greatly appreciated.   He had a serious concussion spring of '07 and an avulsion hip fracture fall '09.  I take nothing for granted.  I pray during the games - for all of the boys.  Zach is also doing well.  That boy can not get enough of soccer.  Eliza is doing crew and riding (her passion).  Jason is coaching two teams and playing soccer, as well.  Soccer, soccer,  and more soccer.  (The only thing I can say in defense of how much time we spend with soccer is that we do it as a family.)

Andrew is driving.  In MA you get your learner's permit at 16 and 6 months later your license.  I hate it.  The first night he was driving home from school (highway driving) I thought that I would be sick to my stomach.  It has gotten easier (a bit), but I miss when I had to strap him into the stroller.

As for me, I am loving my classes.  CBS has been great.  I love history.  I love the Ethiopian connection.  I love the lessons.  I am excited to learn more about the book that is central to my beliefs.  Anatomy and Physiology, too, has been great.  the professor is very nice but not a great teacher.  I love the material, though, so I don't mind reading the text.  The only downside to all the learning is sometimes, I am exhausted at the end of the day.  I am trying to be mindful of that, to save some energy for Jason. Last night, we played backgammon while we talked, and the older kids finished homework.  We use to play backgammon all the time in college.

On the adoption front, I fed-exed our notarized home study to CIS and to KSB, yesterday.  That should complete our 1600a (we completed our fingerprints this summer).  I will wait for the 171. While we are waiting for the paperwork phase to be closed out, I went to a workshop on  Building your family through Birth and Adoption.  Great food for thought.  How do you building a cohesive unit and celebrating differences?  Today, I am participating in a workshop/webinar on how/when to share the difficult story with the adopted child (Ethiopia specific).  While waiting on the paperwork, I love the classes as a way to stay connected to the process.  

My goal is to get our calendar in balance with our true priorities.